I’m assuming you were already aware of the fact you did not sign up for a 9-5 job, at least not yet…if ever. So stop comparing yours with your friends’ or anyone else for that matter. You need to understand that med students will never feel like they have studied enough. Dating in medical school is a preview for what’s to come (if you decide to get married and venture into residency and fellowship).
Do not expect them to drop everything when : You’re in school. If something should change, let your partner know ASAP.
For the next seven to eleven years, your life will look nothing like normal. Respect one another’s time and keep expectations low by communicating honestly and openly. Sometimes that’s all someone needs to know you are thinking of them.
You will miss out on spontaneous weekends with friends, family events, reunions, vacations and more. : It is critical you understand that this relationship is not like any other. Remember, you’re on this journey together, and are both figuring it out as you go.
More importantly, I think it trained me to consistently assume that my husband is doing his best.
This attitude eliminates a lot of issues stemming from unmet expectations and disappointment.
What other profession routinely kicks out a third of its seasoned work force and replaces it with brand new interns every year?
this journey you are on, is so far from normal, it’s not even funny. But if it’s during their 3Communicating is so simple, yet it never is that easy. Just remember to not compare yourself to other couples, understanding your relationship is unique.
They have worked incredibly hard to get where they are (and I’m sure you have too), but unfortunately, their schedules (especially 3 year and residency) do not flex for anyone else in their life. You may have been told or feel otherwise, but that is a lie.
I'm writing this post as The Bear puts in another 6-day, 100-hour work week. " and I read myriad first-hand accounts (this book and this book are good, if you're interested), I don't think I fully understood just what dating a first-year resident really, truly, actually entailed until that first morning his alarm went off at 5 am and I blearily watched him don his scrubs, grab his coffee, peck me on the cheek, and go. Not only that, but when he walks in the door after a grueling shift and you've been anxiously waiting for him to come home so you can fill him on idle work gossip, he's not always up for it. It's not because he doesn't love you and isn't interested, it's because he is so physically and emotionally drained that he needs time to decompress. Oh, you had dinner plans at 8 at that brand new Mexican place? You're ridin' solo now, my friend, because at , a patient in the ICU crashed and he'll be there for at least two more hours doing paperwork. But don't make the same mistake we did and take it a month into residency. He had a how-to video queued up on his computer and he was trying over and over again on his practice stitch board (is that what they call those things, asks the non-medical professional? After a 7-day week where he clocked 100 hours, he was still bettering himself, still putting in time to be a better doctor.
DATE NIGHT Time and communication are essential for a strong, medical marriage. Even during our pre-med years, we went out on a date together every single weekend.
This was sacred time for us together, without distractions, totally focused on each other.